reading

Strange couple of weeks. 

My recuperation from the hospital is going slow.  My foot aches more with each day, but it's healing.  Chris finally left, leaving his bed, tv, and jeep.  I must say that I'm enjoying being alone, but how long will that last?  While at my 'hottie' game, I mentioned about looking for a replacement roomie, and one of the hotties spoke up....said he might be interested.  Oh dear god....a young, cute straight boy in my house that likes to talk dirty.  Im sooo doomed.

Then, I manged to get him interested in my real DnD game.  Ugh...but then, two things: I've got too many people, one of which is totall repugnant. 

Solution, I asked Scott to leave last night.  I did it gently, but he went off none the less.  I don't feell guilty in the slightest...as he was backstabby, socially retarded and just ill when he fell asleep at the table because he's too fat to sleep in a bed. 

...and he says he falls asleep because he has to get up early for work.  um...since when is 10am early?  Man is so delusional.  oh well, good riddance.

School is pretty intensive, pretty much have 4 hours of reading homework every night.  Throw in my foot, limited money and as of this morning, car problems.....ack. 

sigh...can't write long.  Have to go read.

obvious but unseen

second day, little less frantic.  Highlight, chicken ceaser salad and shower.  I've stopped memorizing the nurses names as they come and go.  I have this little ole black man with pneumonia as a roomie, and he sounds just like gollum.  He's had three separate visitations since I've been here, I've had none. 

That's not necessarily a bad thing, but when your own mother doesn't come.  I wonder sometimes why I keep talking to her.  It's been obvious for years that I'm alone in this world. Missing Sophie tremendously.  I'm hoping to go home tomorrow and snuggle with her on the couch. 

surreal

another great fear having to be faced.

sitting here in the hospital for a diabetic ulcer on my heel.  I first discovered it about a week ago, and thought about going to the doctor then, but hesitated because Chris was moving - thus concerned about money.  So today, while getting ready for my game, I decided to take a picture of the wound, so I could see it.

OMG. 

John brought me to the hospital shortly after, and they admitted me.  After several xrays, it's appears the infection has not reached the bone, and is treatable. I got vancomycin intraveneously with saline solution.  Apparently, I was dehydrated with an ungodly high blood pressure reading.

Now, at 1:41am, I can't sleep.  I'm in a room with an old man that keeps hacking. His speaker for his tv is turned up really high, I don't think he hears that well....which is very good as I won't be able to sleep due to my snoring. He's got some kind of infection too.

 I've taken three meds for blood pressure, which is now acceptable, and had another IV dose of zosyn.  John never said it, but I could tell he didn't want to bring me here.  Really feeling isolated because I don't really think anyone cares for me but sophie.  How I wish I could hug her right now.

Chris is moving out; from what I gather, his mother is coming to pick him up this saturday.  I sure hope I'm outta this place tomorrow (Tuesday).  The cute orthopedic surgeon said I'd have to go to Wound Care for definite debridement for some of the tissue, and possibly having my foot cut on.  I say just do it, give me my crutches and let me go home. 

but then, I'll have to deal with the whole paying for this thing, when I'm not even sure i'll be able to survive school.

removing the toxin

So the roomie is moving.  Witth each passing moment, I'm quite sure this is absolutely the best thing.  He lies, steals and then tries to turn it back on me.  He even uses my computer to go online to make me out as the asshole.  lol.

What he's told me:
He intended on selling his busted jeep, giving me 300 and then moving, but he can't find the title.  Apparently he never had the title put in his name since it broke two weeks after buying it.  Which means he never even plated it in his name.  Then PA cut his unemployment off and he only got 190 this last payment.  He finally talked to me Wednesday night, ran some stuff by me.  Said his mother offered to come get him, and that he was going back to Oklahoma.  He wanted to go so badly, that he said he'd probably just leave big shit like his tv, and maybe his jeep here.

What I suspect:
He moved here to be with Kim, the married woman.  He has a history of being on the verge of marrying two women, that ran as far as they could from him  She hasn't been around since right after Christmas. 

What is Known:
I verified online that PA did quit higher tier payments on unemployment as of Feb 18th.  I also changed his user account password on my computer, logged on and started up Firefox.  He has it set up go to right to Facebook....where I read all that he's saying to family.  

He's made me me out to be the biggest asshole of all time.  That he's moving because I accused him of stealing a dollar, that he can't find work.  He spoke of losing his title, and wanting to move...so that must have some truth.  Nothing was mentioned that this was the fourth time money was missing right from wallet, and now one else had been here.

He texted me tonight stating he's waiting on legal aid to call him back about the jeep, and that he would be packed this week.  I replied and said I'd prefer he be out by Friday the 9th. 

I'm ready to wash the walls, clean the thoughts and remove the toxin that was Chris Antee.