Tuesday, September 04, 2012

delimma mine




Doing okay in school, but it's a lot of reading.  I like that it's online and I can do it whenever, but I have to watch and not procrastinate. 

I'm finally able to go to the grocery store for myself again.  My foot is healing nicely but still a way to go.  Just as I get my hopes up though, I get mail from my Dr that I'm having kidney failure and they're not sure why my testosterone levels are so low.  Then last thursday, I'm told the arch in my right foot has collapsed and I'll just have to deal with it.  man it sucks getting old.

I bared my soul to Randy tonight about not really sure if I liked him anymore, that with the absence of feelings, that I was searching for some bridge in our friendship to even continue.  Lately there's been alot more negative than positive and try as I may, I still get angry about several things that happened is what I call the explosion.

Yes I understand it was over a year ago and I should just move on, but I'm so filled with rage over it.  It's not constant, just when little reminders pop up. Can you love someone but not like them, or really want to be around them anymore?

That's my delimma.