much satisfaction

sometimes i just have to smile. Randy asked about re-joining the game and I'm semi-open to it. I guess I'm still bitter about how he walked out. Actually, I'm more bitter about his not trusting me about Angie.

She's the girl that he got busted talking to at Al's party by his wife Tobey. He says nothing happened with her until after he left. Randy says alot of things.

So now he calls when he wants something. When he wants to get a program, or most recently - when his girlie is out of town and he then finds the time to see what I'm doing. Um, yeah....I don't do that with john, why would I do that with him?

new semester has started and I'm pretty optimistic about it. I'm hoping that my psych class will be easier this time - still waiting on the computer science book though.

oh, I finished mask of the betrayer today. shit was hard but I ended up being 28th level by the time it's done.

hmmm, adam sent me a dirty video. wow, the most remarkable thing I can say about it is that he's completely bald now and looks like a pale, bald elf from everquest. I still miss him though, more than I think he knows.

I haven't heard from cedric, and that's a good thing. It's making it less hard to get over it. still though, I lay there at night and think about him. I thought we had something, but it appears I meant nothing afterall. Somehow having that doubt verified doesn't bring much satisfaction.

Playbill

The Ice Queen
The first person to ever damage me; you taught me to mistrust. I'll never call you mother again.
The Prettyboy
How I longed for you, and only told you when I was ready to move on.
The First
You were my first kiss, and my first heartache.
The DJ
I was your first, oh how I loved thee but never told you. You are my biggest regret.
The Bisexual
I sacraficed everything for you, and you left me with nothing. You taught me there are worse things than jealousy, and I hate you for it.
Little 15
You helped me to forget the world outside, and it's little intrigues. You were the first to use me for money.
The Fallen Paladin
My dreams of you have been countless, I should never have told you the truth. I've lost you.
The Crackhead
I told you I wasn't ready, but you conquered me with lies and insincerity. When you left, you took the last part of me I had to give. I think you will be my last.
The Game Player
Your "I love yous" came so frequently, how could I not question your intentions? When you bragged to a friend about how easily you financed a road trip in front of me, then kissed me on the neck, I knew you for what you were.