dancing

I close my eyes and breathe him in. The air is crisp and heavy with his scent. He lays in my arms smiling devilishly while our eyes lock in amazment.

He told me that he felt like he'd found that missing piece to his puzzle.

...forgot about this part

His face, muted blue from the light in the corner, laying passive on my pillow is etched upon my closed eyelids. Wind howling outside and the rain falling passionately; I hold him in my arms....taking him in.

Driving in the sun, his voice lifts and not only matching the words, but elevating them to something surreal. I cried. Later, him asleep upon me and my never wanting it to end.

All these moments, so quick but permanent as well.

He goes home. That night, no phone call - no message. Same thing the next day. I had forgotten about this part.

I'm falling.

Significance

Ever have the feeling that something so special is happening, that merely putting it into words would somehow decrease it's significance? Something's happening like that right now.

Something New

...I've met someone new today.
What an alluring detour this presents.
Not sure if I want to put into words the day
Sitting afterwards, smelled him on my clothes
He looked me in the eyes,
and voiced an opinion.
He kissed me passionately,
and breathed me in.

Which direction shall I go ?

First & Last Time

There are quintessential moments in my life so epitomized in a song that it becomes emblazoned in my memory. This song always makes me cry because it reminds me of when I first met Adam. He was so nervous in my arms, but it was one of the most magical moments of my life.

The first time ever I saw your face
I thought the sun rose in your eyes
And the moon and stars
Were the gifts you gave
To the dark and the endless skies

The first time ever I kissed your mouth
I felt the earth move in my hand
Like the trembling heart of a captive bird
That was there at my command, my love

And the first time ever I lay with you
I felt your heart so close to mine
And I knew our joy would fill the earth
And last til the end of time, my love

The first time ever I saw your face
Your face, your face, your face

He's seeing his exboyfriend again, on the weekends. Maybe to lessen the pain, maybe to bridge the gap of a romance that can still carry on. Either way, I don't have a part of it and it's useless for me to keep pining over something I'll never have again. Well, at least not with him.

So, I'm biding farewell to Adam.