gotta laugh

oh man. sometimes shit happens that you just gotta laugh to keep from screaming. someone told me yesterday that blogs are for bitching, which I guess I've done alot...and doing it now.

you know, i'm not young, i'm not thin, but I've got way too much going for me to fall for some bullshit like what I was offered yesterday. Every relationship, I've had to share my partner with someone....whether it's a girl, someone online or the partner in an open relationship. I'm so friggin tired of all that.

It took so much outta me saying goodbye to cedric, who is probably the best guy I've ever known, but I had to do it for me.

And then comes this local guy, my age....with baggage. Nothing to offer me, no job, no place of his own and he's not even single. His proposal, to hang out on the weekends when his boyfriend is at work, I can't call him but could he call me to talk when the bf isn't around.

Um yeah, let me jump all over that. You know, optimism aside, even if he could be someone in my life, say in the future,....his actions speak so much of his character.

I'm so not compromising anymore. I care too much about myself.

I'm done.

oh....high definition rocks. :P

can you guess my mood

I feel like a stranger to myself. Who is this person I see in the mirror?

Saturday and I'm home alone, procrastinating on homework, listening to old cure and wondering.

how did I get here?