fireworks everyday
I lay still, face turned toward the steady breeze as it blows over me. Tiny hairs dance in it's currents; astrid bursts of light explode in the sky, I think of this night, and nights past...
...Stiffled away in the upstairs room, I lay with my head at the window and watched the fireworks. Incense burned near me and I dreamt of love to come. I was alone and longed to escape...I climbed out onto the roof, longing for a release.
...We sat on the hanging swing of raymond's parent's front porch. They were somewhere in colorado at that point, and the three of us (michael, kevin and I) watched lustfully as straight boys meandered throughout the house. We giggled and then ran when raymond through fireworks over the roof at us.
...Chris's basement smelled dank, but was cool and secluded. We talked and teased, but never touched. As I lay sleepily, I heard the distant booms of the explosions downtown, smelled the ever present lingering of clove cigarettes and felt alive.
...our new house. John and I had just moved in that weekend, and we lay together in our new room. Sweet, conditioned air blew over us and we snuggled under a blanket while watching the televison. Our new house....our new hope.
...I knew there was problems. Adam just wasn't happy. We drove in silence to my grandmother's, spent an eternity in her back yard and wiped sweat from our brows. We walked down the alley and the physical distance matched the emotional. I would never see him in eleven more days.
...Steven had tried to keep it from me that he was leaving. We stood in the front yard; the breeze blowing through the leaves. Cicadas sang their lament and I knew the end was coming. I both longed for and dreaded the release. How like fireworks is love.
...We'd spent the day at randy's house and now set at the gas station while the kids were inside shopping. I'd always envy'd randy's family and those little moments I'd never had. Kaijah and Chandler bounded out of the store, sprinting for our car. All the while dancing and smiling in the rain. It was the end to a perfect day....and I realized. I was finally having that moment.
Some people wait for that one time a year to see fireworks. Some of us, lucky ones I think, see fireworks everyday.
...Stiffled away in the upstairs room, I lay with my head at the window and watched the fireworks. Incense burned near me and I dreamt of love to come. I was alone and longed to escape...I climbed out onto the roof, longing for a release.
...We sat on the hanging swing of raymond's parent's front porch. They were somewhere in colorado at that point, and the three of us (michael, kevin and I) watched lustfully as straight boys meandered throughout the house. We giggled and then ran when raymond through fireworks over the roof at us.
...Chris's basement smelled dank, but was cool and secluded. We talked and teased, but never touched. As I lay sleepily, I heard the distant booms of the explosions downtown, smelled the ever present lingering of clove cigarettes and felt alive.
...our new house. John and I had just moved in that weekend, and we lay together in our new room. Sweet, conditioned air blew over us and we snuggled under a blanket while watching the televison. Our new house....our new hope.
...I knew there was problems. Adam just wasn't happy. We drove in silence to my grandmother's, spent an eternity in her back yard and wiped sweat from our brows. We walked down the alley and the physical distance matched the emotional. I would never see him in eleven more days.
...Steven had tried to keep it from me that he was leaving. We stood in the front yard; the breeze blowing through the leaves. Cicadas sang their lament and I knew the end was coming. I both longed for and dreaded the release. How like fireworks is love.
...We'd spent the day at randy's house and now set at the gas station while the kids were inside shopping. I'd always envy'd randy's family and those little moments I'd never had. Kaijah and Chandler bounded out of the store, sprinting for our car. All the while dancing and smiling in the rain. It was the end to a perfect day....and I realized. I was finally having that moment.
Some people wait for that one time a year to see fireworks. Some of us, lucky ones I think, see fireworks everyday.
posted by Robbie at
11:12 PM
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